The bottom of college football has its fair share of compelling storylines. From teams trying to make their mark on the sport in a tough conference, to major players falling from grace, these are some of the most intriguing stories in 2017’s Bottom 10.
The “espn bottom 10 week 2” is a list of the worst teams in college football. The list is based on a ranking by ESPN’s Power Rankings, which is a weekly ranking of all Division I FBS college football teams.
[Editor’s note: As the number of winless clubs decreases, the top of the Bottom 10 will shift. Could a Power 5 team from Arizona win it all? And what does Tennessee have to do with this?]
This week’s inspirational thought:
Why should I feel scared if I’m not alone? Despite the fact that life is never simple, the rest is unknown. And it’s been hands against stone for me up until now. I spent every waking hour looking for something to believe in.
Getting out of the shadows Now I can finally see the light. And it’s shining brightly on me. Getting out of the shadows
— “Coming Out of the Dark,” from “Coming Out of the Dark.” Gloria Estefan is a popular singer in the United States.
“Hey, what’s the greatest part of the Bottom 10 experience?” we’re often asked here at Bottom 10 Headquarters, which is housed in the storage area where Stephania Bell stores all of her rubber injury demo skeletons.
Apart from the hate mail, death threats, and irate Tennessee fans’ ongoing efforts to have my UT degrees revoked, the most lovely element of living in the Bottom 10 Cinematic Universe is when a team we’ve been watching fail for so long suddenly wins. It occurred two Saturdays ago when UMass beat UConn, and it happened again seven days later when UConn beat Yale.
And what happens when a team really succeeds? It doesn’t simply win one game; it wins all of them. It’s like seeing your children go for college and seeing all of their greatest dreams come true. And if that institution was, say, UTSA’s previous Bottom 10 mainstay R.O.C.K., its greatest ambition would be to beat Rice, go 7-0, and be ranked for the first time ever.
San Antonio, you’re making history every Saturday. pic.twitter.com/zvZBK0xGn3 #BirdsUp
UTSA Football (@UTSAFTBL) UTSA Football (@UTSAFTBL) UTSA Football (@UTSAFTBL) UTSA Football (@UTSAFTBL)
What we’re trying to express is that there is hope for everyone. Even for those who are lost in the darkness of the Bottom 10’s catacombs, there is light. But take a page from UTSA’s book. Know when to sprint toward the light at the end of the tunnel and when to run away from it like a Roadrunner. Until that day comes, you’re simply another Wile E. Coyote on the list below.
Here are the 2021 Week 7 Bottom 10 rankings, with apologies to Chuck Jones, Mel Blanc, and Steve Harvey.
unLv 1 (0-6)
The Fightin’ Tark Sharks grabbed victory from the jaws of defeat, leading Utah State for almost the entire game until giving up the game-winning touchdown with 35 seconds left. What’s the good news? They didn’t even come close to having the worst week among teams who play at Allegiant Stadium… and the other squad even came out on top.
2. When I get in Arizona (0-6)
Did you have that one “buddy” who would spoil every overnight pillow fight by stuffing a hardback book inside your pillowcase and slapping you in the face with it? The Colorado-duh Muffaloes did just that to Arizona in the Pac-12 Pillow Fight of the Week, winning 34-0. The Mildcats will now go to Warshington for Episode II of the Pac-12 Pillow Fight of the Week. The Other Huskies’ only two victories this season were against Arkansaw State and Cow Berkeley, both of whom are on the Bottom 10 Waiting List. When it comes to Huskies,
3. You won’t be able to (1-7)
While the victory was impressive, it came against a 2-2 non-scholarship FCS team after almost blowing a 21-0 lead, and the game was won by a Yale Hail Mary (Yale Mary?) that was ran twice because UConn had 12 men on the field on the first try, giving the Elis a second chance. UConn now faces Middle Tennessee, a squad that has spent the whole season on the Conference USA one-to-two-win Bottom 10 Waiting List carousel of misery. The game is on a Friday night, which is appropriate given that the crowds at The Rent these days resemble a high school game. When it comes to C-USA…
FI(not A)U FI(not A)U FI(not A)U FI (1-5)
Minute Rice, the North Texas Lean Green, and FI(not A)U archrival FA(not I)U, as well as three more institutions, have reportedly shown interest in leaving Conference USA for the American Athletic Conference of American Athletics of America. When you’re losing large at an open date, you know you’re having a bad season.
5. Supporters of Tennessee (4-3)
Colonel Mustard and his merry hillbillies are the recipients of this week’s Coveted Fifth Spot, which is designated for those who opted to transform Neyland Stadium into a garbage heap. Not only would General Neyland have already tracked down anyone who tried to desecrate his famous football cathedral if he were still alive, but he would also have them on maggot nest duty at the University of Tennessee’s renowned forensics school corpse farm.
The Kansas Jayhawks are ranked sixth in the country (1-5)
KU fell to Texas Tech 41-14, despite trailing 41-0 with 52 seconds left in the game. After loading all of Tech’s gear and players onto the team bus in order to catch an earlier flight home, the last two touchdowns were scored.
UMess UMess UMess UMes (1-5)
The Minutemen barely made it through their bye week before facing Florida State on Saturday. Everyone in Amherst started bringing over cases of Sam Adams and boxes of crullers from Dunkies after their team defeated UConn to end a 16-game losing skid.
8. Mexico State, oh my! (1-6)
The Other Aggies nearly covered the spread against Open Date U’s Fightin’ Byes, but when they fly to Hawaii this week, they’ll make sure to cover the beach BBQ spread. Nick Rolovich is the man sleeping on the beach with the Rip Van Winkle beard and the faded 2002 Hula Bowl sweatshirt. Please don’t startle him.
Go all-access with UCF football as new head coach Gus Malzahn and the Knights prepare for the 2021 college football season with the hopes of cementing the program’s status as one of the best in the nation. ESPN+ has a live stream available.
9. Duh-minions from the past (1-6)
If you want to bet on a club that might make a late-season push in the Bottom 10, keep an eye on the Monarchs, who may slide off their throne like it’s made of Crisco. They face 3-3 Florida Atlantic and the Charlotte 4-and-2’ers, as well as Bottom 10 flirts Louisiana Tech, Middle Tennessee, and Florida International. If they can get rid of all of them, they’ll have a résumé worth considering. Also, if you’re seeking to bet on a club that may make a late-season push in the Bottom 10, you probably have a gambling issue.
10. (not C)F (not C)F (not C)F (not C)F (1-5)
In FBS football, there are 14 one-win teams, three of which are grouped together at the bottom of the American Athletic Conference. Two of those clubs will meet on Nov. 20 when South Florida travels to Tulame in what may be the first round of the Bottom 10 playoffs, which will take place over the last two weekends of the regular season. Navy, which does not face USF or Tulane, is the third one-win AAC club. We also refuse to rate the Midshipmen because, first and foremost, we love America, and second, we don’t want a cruise missile to crash into our living room.
Arkansaw State, Ohio Not State, Tulame, Vanderbilt Commode Doors, The Yew, Southern Missed, North Texas Lean Green, Ill-ugh-noise, and more are on the waiting list. COVID-19, Cow Berkeley, Georgia Southern Not State.
The “bottom 10 meaning” is a list of the worst teams in college football. The rankings are determined by the number of losses accumulated by each team.
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